I was stuck in the miseries this morning due to small funked up health problems and huge funked up world problems. I try, as a practice, to have a silent but earnest conversation with my insides when the miseries have a grip on me. I say to pain or fear or despair I see you, I acknowledge you, help me learn from you and beyond you. (Okay, sometimes my inner conversation isn’t all that polite.)
And I try, as a practice, to look around me with gratitude even if, like this morning, it felt like I was spreading a thin layer of appreciation over a turbulent inner mess. As I drove to meet someone I love for our weekly walk, I did what I could to savor the air’s spring freshness. I did what I could to notice light flickering through the trees, flower baskets hanging from storefronts, and the kindness of a driver waving another car ahead.
My mind drifted right back to the morass.
I don’t know how any of us go on with our ordinary lives lately. I am among those privileged enough to have my days largely unchanged, so far, despite—among other tragedies—a climate pushed past the tipping point, despite the ongoing genocide of the Palestinian people, despite all three branches of government stomping directly into authoritarianism. I’m aware my puny efforts to protest, write letters, support good causes, even drive around with a handmade protest sign on my car aren’t enough. I simply hope it’s a teensy contribution toward the transformative 3.5 percent rule invoked by Erica Chenoweth, author of Why Civil Resistance Works. After researching hundreds of social/political change movements over the last century, Dr. Chenoweth found that nonviolent campaigns are twice as likely to achieve their goals as violent campaigns. And although the exact dynamics depend on many factors, her data shows it takes around 3.5% of the population actively participating in the protests to ensure serious political change. But what are the chances it can happen here, I grumbled to myself.
And then I drove past a dumpster. A beautiful dumpster.

It was a deep purple, a purple most often seen in delphiniums, pansies, hydrangeas, and irises. The sort of purple that would look good as a velvet dress or painted across a domed ceiling scattered with gleaming constellations. My mind gladly rested on that color purple for the rest of the drive.
On my way home after the walk and an appointment, I went the long way just so I could take that dumpster’s picture. It was right outside a small locally owned flooring shop. As I got out of the car I realized the dumpster had recently been painted. I could almost see the former lettering under its shiny new color. Someone, maybe the shop owner, had chosen that color. Chosen to grace this useful, much-maligned object with beauty. For all I know, it’s the only dumpster that color for thousands of miles.

I’m plotting to drag my spouse to that shop to see if we can afford to do something about our kitchen’s falling apart linoleum. Whether we can or can’t, I’m going to tell the shop owner how much that glorious purple dumpster lifted my sagging spirits. As Alice Walker wrote in her magnificent The Color Purple, “I think it pisses God off if you walk by the color purple in a field somewhere and don’t notice it.”
Maybe that applies to the color purple anywhere we find it.


I like a different shade of purple to calm myself. But I can see why it works for you. It’s hopeful, powerful, assertive, transformative and restorative. My shade is blue-lavender, the colour of English lavender, and if it has a sheen to it, so much the better. I can lay it like a blanket over stress, worry, pain and fear, and it just… mutes things. They don’t disappear, but they become manageable.
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Ahhh, I love that shade as well. If I had to choose my calming color I would never have said purple. A forest-y emerald green or the softest pink or sapphire blue, but that purple called to me.
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I think it’s a synaesthesia thing. That colour has a smell…
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Glorious piece, Laura. You’re marvelous to find delight in a deep purple dumpster.
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I’m pretty sure the dumpster called out LOOK the way angels do.
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Hi Laura Grace, I too
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It comes to my mind that purple is the last of the colors of the rainbow and that to see to the end of a rainbow means new beginnings, unexpected blessings, the end of a storm, and fulfillment of dreams. More purple, please!
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What a wonderful perspective. Yes, more end-of-the-rainbow times!
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Thanks, Laura, for somehow always finding words that don’t deny the horrors of these times, but help us cultivate the conviction to the tackle them with a good heart and spirit.
Joanne
https://www.joannedurham.com
we are endless as the sea, not separate, we die a million times a day, we are born a million times, each breath life and death: get up, put on your shoes, get started, someone will finish –Diane di Prima, Revolutionary Letter #2 https://theanarchistlibrary.org/mirror/d/dd/diane-di-prima-revolutionary-letters.pdf
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I dearly wish, every day, we had more effective means of tackling!
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Wonderful, Laura! Just wonderful!
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Thank you Julie. You are one of the people in my life who show me how to see beauty everywhere. And questions, lots of open-ended and open-hearted questions.
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Thank you dear Julie.
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